The Apostle Paul writes “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4, ESV). Notice the “not only,” which is not included in the New International Version. I prefer this translation of the verse because if you do not also look out for your own interests, how else will you keep your temple of the Holy Spirit open for God’s purposes. Besides, there is that Love your neighbor as yourself theme that weaves its way throughout Scripture. Many neighbors would not put up with being loved and treated in the same way some Christians love and treat themselves. And finally, what use is it to be “as shrewd as snakes” and “as innocent as doves” if it is not to look out for your own interests in addition to those of others.
Questions
1) Does the thought of looking out for your own interests feel foreign to you? If so, why?
2) Does the thought of looking out for the interests of others feel foreign to you? If so, why?
3) Would your neighbors be satisfied receiving from you the same love you have for yourself? If not, did others teach you not to love yourself? If so, which of God’s truths were their lessons based on?
Our ‘One Mores’ and ‘Not Yets’
Save for a few notable exceptions in the Bible and when our Lord returns, everyone on this earth is headed for physical death, and when that happens for a Christian, his or her temple of the Holy Spirit will be closed. And when that happens for you, my question is, “How many one mores and not yets will be left waiting at your temple door?”
A one more is what you will want one more of just before you die. One more hug from your spouse or child. One more chance to tell a parent or friend how much you love and appreciate them. One more chance to sit with family members after a meal and share stories that get embellished over the years. One more chance to make a difference in someone’s life. One more chance to feed a hungry child or comfort someone who has a broken heart.
Think about what your one mores will be, and give as many of them as you can before your temple is closed. I use the word “give” rather than “get” because the one mores I have mentioned are not only a gift from God to you, they are also a gift to the people who receive them from you. One more hug from you. One more kind word from you. One more meal or prayer.
A not yet is something in the future that you are not yet able to do such as start a career, get married, become a parent, or watch your daughter or son graduate. Perhaps these not yets are for you to enjoy with your granddaughter or grandson. Maybe your not yet is a ministry you want to start, or one in which you want to serve. While many not yets are stolen from us by circumstances, illness, or age, we should strive to not let any die unnecessarily from a lifetime of neglect, fears, and excuses.
Questions
1) What will your one mores be?
2) What could you do today to give one more of your one mores?
3) What are your not yets that are worth taking care of yourself and living for?
Freddie
My life changing lesson in one mores came while I was a practicing veterinarian and was examining a growth on the side of a dog’s chest. The lesson came as a single question from the dog’s owner. Before I reveal the question, let’s step out of the examination room so I can give you some background.
I bought my first veterinary hospital from Dr. Frederick E. Leach in Virginia Beach, Virginia. He began his career as a small boy who, wearing a floor-length smock, escorted clients and their pets to the examination rooms for his father. When he started his own veterinary clinic he listed his father’s name above his own because as he told me, “I owe everything I am to him.”
Freddie and I began a lifelong friendship that lasted a little over a year because he died of leukemia at the age of thirty-five. His mother was constantly at his side, and did everything in her power to save him. She would have gladly traded her life for his.
The last time Freddie and I spoke was over the phone while he was in isolation and undergoing therapy. I could hear how weary he was and I told him I was sorry that he had to go through so much pain from the treatments. His immediate response was, “The pain is nothing compared to the thought of leaving my son.” The call was short and I told him that I loved him, appreciated all that he had done for me and my family, and that I would be praying for him. The last thing he said to me was, “I’ll see you later.”
Let’s step back into the examination room for my client’s question. I asked if her dog had previously developed any similar growths to which she replied, “Yes, he had one taken off by Dr … what’s his name? You know, Dr … Dr … Ohhh … what’s his name?” As she was searching for his name I leaned back against the counter and the sound of her voice faded as my thoughts grew louder. “What’s his name?” I repeated to myself. “What’s his name! You were a 10% discount client who he came in after-hours for, and you cannot even remember his name!! What’s his name!!!” I leaned forward slightly, and asked softly, “Freddie?” She replied, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, Dr. Leach.”
Now I don’t mean to put my client in a bad light because I forget names with the best of them – sometimes momentarily even the names of my daughters. That said, on the drive home that night I could not help but think that today I was Doctor Mills, and someday I would be Doctor What’s his name? Was I going to be Daddy What’s his name? or Husband What’s his name? or even worse, stand in front of the mirror someday and see, What’s his name?
It was not until several years later I understood that my real question was, “Are the professional one mores I am doing today worth trading another day of my life, and possibly turning my not yets into not evers?” I have to confess that even now, some days are better trades than others. Some of my best trades, however, were the years of lunches after Freddie’s passing I had with his father and mother, and the times visiting them after we moved away from Virginia Beach. When we are together we laugh and often cry as we remember Freddie and think about the one mores we never had. My point is that you should seize all of the one mores with your loved ones that you can, while you can, because there will come a day when your temple or their temple will be closed.
When I stand before Jesus and He examines my life, I think He will be very interested in the impact of my life on the lives of those around me. I think He will be looking at those lives closely to see if He can find any one mores of ours in them. I use the word “ours” because they are His one mores through me as well.
When it comes to the one mores He will be looking for, there are many you and I could think of. Think of an adult in the future who will read better because you are teaching him today while he is a child. Think of a single mother who now has groceries and someone to talk with because you choose to stand with her rather than abandon her as someone else did. Think of a young athlete who you speak ability into and practice with. Think of the people who experience tragedies that you cannot change other than to make sure they are not alone when they go through them. Think of all the things Jesus would do if He could only be there in person. Then think of the fact that He is – in you.
I’ve used the word “think” a lot because you are responsible for the intentional choices you make in how you invest your life. This is important because your choices matter not only to you, but also to Jesus and those around you.
With all of your one mores and not yets at stake, along with Jesus’ one mores and not yets through you, it makes sense to take care of your body. I have no doubt that if you could see all that God has prepared for you to do in the future, you would do everything in your power to keep your temple of the Holy Spirit open for as long as possible. Ultimately, however, your temple may be closed much earlier than you and your friends and family want, as it was for Freddie. As such, it is wise for you to enjoy each day that you are given without trading it for one more worry or allowing it to be consumed by a fear-filled not yet.
Worry
Many times we imagine far into the future through the lens of our wounds and disappointments. The one mores and not yets in these painful predictions can feel unbearable when the presence of Jesus is not included. The problem is that God’s grace is offered in our reality at the moment we need it, and we usually fail to include it when we are thinking/worrying about the future. So, if your mind happens to wonder into the future, don’t forget to take Jesus with you.
Allowing your mind to dwell in a dark future is not without consequence to your body. It often cannot tell the difference between thoughts and reality, so it responds to the stress of thoughts as though they actually happened. Mark Twain once said, “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” Thinking about the future with Jesus in it is fine, however, immersing yourself in dark predictions without Him will eventually deplete you of all hope, and rob you of any possibility of experiencing joy. And if these dark predictions take hold in your mind, you may as well place a sign on your temple door that says,
Out for worry.
Not sure when or if I will be back.
The Apostle Paul addressed worry and anxiety in his letter to the Philippians.
4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:4-9)
Not a lot more to say other than you might want to read it again.
Questions
1) What one mores are you doing that make a difference to others?
2) Have wounds and disappointments caused you to lock the door of your temple in order to keep others out? If so, what could a reopening look and feel like to you? To them?
3) If you open your temple to others, what is the chance you will be wounded and disappointed? The answer is 100%. Do you believe that Jesus is God-enough to heal and restore you? After all, He is familiar with being repeatedly wounded and disappointed.